259 replies [Last post]
CCBabyDust
CCBabyDust's picture
Offline
Joined: 01/10/2011

Thanks Alisha. Big smile

Nothing like AF & cramps to make one feel BLEH...
also, feeling pretty guilty over spending a few hundred dollars on lil'monsters birthday, especially after one of the other moms I was in the NICU with posted this on FB (names & places edited out):
"We have decided that in lieu of the invitations, decorations, and presents we are going to contribute to the Neonatal Intensive Care Unit (NICU) Family Support Program Fund. We were so impressed by the high level of care, compassionate medical team, and personalized treatment we received at the Hospital, that we invite you to join us in supporting the many families that we sat alongside of who are in need of the financial and emotional support to cope with the birth of a premature baby. We * thank you in advance for both the gifts you intend to give to the fund and the gift of your presence in our lives.
The Neonatal Intensive Care Unit - Family Support Program Fund: The purpose of the fund is to provide funding which would include supporting the Family Support Specialists who work closely with each family providing support for parents and siblings, answers to concerns, help obtaining medical information and assistance with future transitions. The Family Support Specialists also provide parents with materials such as the parent care kit that includes infant necessities (i.e. breast pump, bottles, diapers, etc.) to return home."

I think that's sooo lovely of them to do. I also feel pretty crappy about spending money we didn't really have in the first place on his party that he won't remember. Puzzled We could have bought him something nice (keepsake, etc) and just had the realitives over to watch him mash his cake... instead we have 70+ people coming (hopefully people read the "don't bring presents" part of the invite, as I will not have any of them opened up there)
I don't know. I guess what's done is done now. Can't change an avalance once it's started! Shock

Also, (now this post is getting rambling) I have been seriously re-questioning our thoughts/plans to begin ttc this spring. My baby boy is still a baby to me. He can't walk or talk yet. He's still in diapers (obviously & will be for a while!) I almost have been wondering if we should wait longer? I wonder if it's my AF hormones being all crazy? It could do with DH being distant lately too... sigh... so anyway, if you made it through this post thanks!! Smile

babydust xx

__________________

Married my Best Friend 8/2009
TTC#1 for 9 months/ BFP 3/2011
James born @36weeks 11/2011
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
Journey TTC#2
bfp 9/2012 - chemical
bfp 2/2013- m/c @6.5weeks
bfp 10/2013- baby bean is a GIRL!
Lilypie First Birthday tickers

kiwi kids
Offline
Joined: 11/07/2011

CC - I felt (and still feel to a certain extent) very similar about DD when we started to TTC again. I assumed it would take as long the second time as it did the first time and thought that if I got to her second birthday and I wasn't pregnant again yet that I would be so mad at myself for wasting time not TTC sooner so it is a bit of a catch 22 really. I got pregnant within a couple of months and freaked out because she really was still a baby then. DD was 8 months old when we conceived so was crawling and pulling up but not really very independent etc.
She will be 17 months this weekend and is a proper toddler now with running around, understanding what I say to her etc but I still worry that I am about to ruin her happy little life by diverting some of the attention away from her. But I do know that having a sibling is an amazing gift and that she probably won't even care as long as she still gets special time with mum and dad.
I honestly feel now that no matter what age she would have been when we had another baby I would still see her as my baby so I am rolling with it!

It will work out how it is supposed to I guess.

AlishaTrying
Offline
Joined: 01/17/2011

omg cc, I was thinking the same thing the other day! Ella is still so little, and not walking, or talking yet...but still 5 months away then another 9 so we'll see!! I'll bet when spring rolls around you'll be ready to go, but enjoy your little one, I think we'll know when we're ready to start!! Also, don't stress about the b-day!! You do what you want and don't feel guilty at all! I did the no gifts thing too and I thought that was good Smile you want to have pics to remember it by and you want people to be entertained so don't stress!!!!

__________________

Daisypath Anniversary tickers

AlishaTrying
Offline
Joined: 01/17/2011

omg cc, I was thinking the same thing the other day! Ella is still so little, and not walking, or talking yet...but still 5 months away then another 9 so we'll see!! I'll bet when spring rolls around you'll be ready to go, but enjoy your little one, I think we'll know when we're ready to start!! Also, don't stress about the b-day!! You do what you want and don't feel guilty at all! I did the no gifts thing too and I thought that was good Smile you want to have pics to remember it by and you want people to be entertained so don't stress!!!!

__________________

Daisypath Anniversary tickers

CCBabyDust
CCBabyDust's picture
Offline
Joined: 01/10/2011

Thanks for taking the time to read & comment ladies! It makes me feel better. YES KIWI- exactly, I am feeling like it will take a loooong time, but who knows. I suppose there is something to be said for it will be what it will be... no controling life! It just dishes out whatever it wants at you whenever it seems!
Alisha, also a good point- it will be several months before ttc, then probably many months of actual ttc, then 9 months of pregnancy- so heck, he could be 4 years old before a new baby is born! & thanks! I hope his bday is fun Party

__________________

Married my Best Friend 8/2009
TTC#1 for 9 months/ BFP 3/2011
James born @36weeks 11/2011
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
Journey TTC#2
bfp 9/2012 - chemical
bfp 2/2013- m/c @6.5weeks
bfp 10/2013- baby bean is a GIRL!
Lilypie First Birthday tickers

CCBabyDust
CCBabyDust's picture
Offline
Joined: 01/10/2011

So we had his party- it went as well as a 1 yr old party can go. He liked the cake & balloons Party It was very cute.
I got no good pics of him though, but oh well. At least I remembered to take pics! lol

I am all emotional today- it was a year ago today that my water broke & I was sitting in the hospital room waiting for something to happen. It felt like an eternity then- but wow, time really FLIES! I am so blessed & happy that he's here & healthy and wONEderful! Wink
I have to hurry up with those thank you notes now! lol

and afm- I started re-taking prenatal vitamins today. Several reasons- mostly since we're going to be starting ttc in a few months, I figured I might as well continue on with them. Plus I have been feeling some fatigue lately (even though he's sleeping fairly well) and wonder if some of it is due to lacking vitamins. I am also trying my best to be more mindful of drinking plenty of water (since i stopped breastfeeding, I have been a water drinking slacker! lol)
Anyone know how long it takes for the boobies to "dry up"? lol, I stopped bf him over a month ago and I still am getting a few leaks here and there and a few drops of milk? I do not pump or anything. IDK...

babydust to everyone!

__________________

Married my Best Friend 8/2009
TTC#1 for 9 months/ BFP 3/2011
James born @36weeks 11/2011
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
Journey TTC#2
bfp 9/2012 - chemical
bfp 2/2013- m/c @6.5weeks
bfp 10/2013- baby bean is a GIRL!
Lilypie First Birthday tickers

AlishaTrying
Offline
Joined: 01/17/2011

I'm glad the party was a success!! I didn't get any good pics at Ella's b-day either, but a few ok ones!! I can still get milk out and it's been over a month, so don't worry!! I think by the end of this week I should be completely dried up and I stopped nursing sept 25th!
I was thinking of starting prenatals again too, I've been bad and haven't been taking even a multivitamin so I figure I might as well start prenatals again! I'm also thinking of taking mecca again and drinking fertilitea, my period has been wonky again, super long cycles....was yours out of wack after nursing?

__________________

Daisypath Anniversary tickers

CCBabyDust
CCBabyDust's picture
Offline
Joined: 01/10/2011

Thanks Alisha- to answer about my cycles- no, they returned full force NORMAL Stare at 2 months post partum! Shock
& I was exclusively breastfeeding too! Ohhh well. I guess in a wierd way it makes me feel a little better to know my body is functioning how it should.... or at least that's what I am telling myself! Tongue

__________________

Married my Best Friend 8/2009
TTC#1 for 9 months/ BFP 3/2011
James born @36weeks 11/2011
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
Journey TTC#2
bfp 9/2012 - chemical
bfp 2/2013- m/c @6.5weeks
bfp 10/2013- baby bean is a GIRL!
Lilypie First Birthday tickers

CCBabyDust
CCBabyDust's picture
Offline
Joined: 01/10/2011

I will probably be posting more sporadically until actually ttc again. I have beem doing lots of thinking- I need to focus on now, today, this moment. Thankful for all the blessings that I have and need to not worry about the future. It will be what it will be.
Of course I am still looking forward to ttc- but also don't want to become my "old" ttc self again. It CONSUMED me. Every day. I cannot do that to myself, my hubby nor my precious son.
I have to remember to focus on today, becuase as one fab momma who lost her lil boy to cancer puts it- there's no day but today (from Rent) SO TRUE! Puts a lot into perspective.
hugs & babydust!

__________________

Married my Best Friend 8/2009
TTC#1 for 9 months/ BFP 3/2011
James born @36weeks 11/2011
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
Journey TTC#2
bfp 9/2012 - chemical
bfp 2/2013- m/c @6.5weeks
bfp 10/2013- baby bean is a GIRL!
Lilypie First Birthday tickers

CCBabyDust
CCBabyDust's picture
Offline
Joined: 01/10/2011

**edited after crying when I read my post. I dont' want my bad mood wrecking anyone else's day**

hugs & babydust

I am chicken little today- "the sky is falling, the sky is falling" Sad Sad Sad
Perhaps I need to go for a walk & clear my head.... or dig out the christmas decorations Santa that might help my mood....

__________________

Married my Best Friend 8/2009
TTC#1 for 9 months/ BFP 3/2011
James born @36weeks 11/2011
Lilypie Third Birthday tickers
Journey TTC#2
bfp 9/2012 - chemical
bfp 2/2013- m/c @6.5weeks
bfp 10/2013- baby bean is a GIRL!
Lilypie First Birthday tickers